why do I feel like I lost something I never had?
by The Cinder Crown
Summary: It was nothing new that Fleur sent her little sister to look after her children and husband, not even so late at night... What Gabrielle didn't expect was having a heart-to-heart conversation with the red-haired men... nor did she think that the silly girl-crush she once had on him would re-surface with such a force.


**[late] February fic written for Lin! I hope you like it!**

 **Written for the New Years Zodiac Writing challenge at Hogwarts school of witchraft and wizardry Ox #1. Write about a person with at least three of the following Characteristics: Loyal, reliable, thorough, strong, reasonable, steady, determined.**

 **Written for the 365 drabble day event at Hogwarts #265. Cottage**

 **Prompts from the Gringotts Prompt Bank:**

 _ **"Love. The reason I dislike that word is that it means too much for me, far more than you can understand."**_

 _ **What's worse? New wounds which are so horribly painful or old wounds that should have healed years ago and never did? – Tragic, greys,**_

 _ **"Never trust a person that has let you down more than two times. Once was a warning, twice was a lesson, and anything more than that is simply taking advantage." – Tradgic, unknown 14**_

 _ **"It sounds plausible enough tonight, but wait until tomorrow. Wait for the common sense of morning." – H.G. Wells, The Time Machine**_

 _ **"The heart dies a slow death, shedding each hope like leaves until one day there are none. No hopes. Nothing remains." Arthur Golden, Memoirs of a Geisha**_

 **Words:** 1,983

 **A.N.: Warning, things get a little heated towards the end...**

* * *

 **Heal my heart (before it slowly dies completely)**

* * *

As soon as she got back on her feet, Gabrielle straightened her robes and checked that all her belongings had arrived with her. The young woman had never really been very fond of portkeys, especially in her younger years… (Just thinking about the many times she had landed flat on her face made the blonde cringe.)

Nevertheless, Fleur had asked her to help out with the kids tonight, since she was still busy with her work, so being the always **reliable** little sister, Gabrielle had packed a little suitcase and made her way over to Shell Cottage.

Passing the tomb of the little house elf, she created a flower and put it down on the grave. She had never personally met the little elf, but the stories she had been told were more than enough to think about him every once in a while.

Finally reaching the front door, she knocked three times. Despite the fact that nobody answered, the young woman decided to wait a little longer. Naturally, Fleur had given her a key to the house, but Gabrielle didn't really want to use it now, since she was very **determined** to only use it in 'real' emergencies.

The minutes passed, but eventually, Bill opened the door.

"It's about time you get here, Fleur… Victoire has been asking all day where you – "

As his blue eyes fell on the younger Delacour girl, he sighed in frustration.

"Elle! I'm sorry, I thought you were – "

"Fleur?"

"Well, yes, but do come in. It's lovely to see you," he said, and kissed her on the cheek.

The blonde woman followed him in the living room and sat down on the small table.

"Tea?"

"Yes, that would be lovely, Bill."

Trying not to be too suspicious, Gabrielle watched her brother-in-law through the opened door. He looked tired, even a little worn out, but still incredibly handsome. In a way, Gabrielle had always envied her sister that she had managed to get herself such a man like Bill. It seemed that all the men Elle had been dating so far, were not really suitable for her. There was Tony, who kept putting his work before here, then there was Allan, who revealed after a couple of month that he didn't want children of his own and last but not least, Daniel, whom she had found in the bedroom with another woman…

It was painful, yes, but it had also taught her to never let her guard down again, that she was a lot **stronger** than she thought and that one should never trust a person that has let you down more than two times. Once was a warning, twice was a lesson, and anything more than that is simply taking advantage.

Shaking her head, she tried to focus on the present time.

For some reason, the entire room was lovely decorated. She just noticed it now, but there was a small burning candle in the middle of the table, and wonderfully smelling rose-petals all over it. The whole living room seemed cozy, and from what she could make out, there were only red and white coloured pillows on the couch…

The young woman had been in her sister's living room before – even like today at a very late hour – but it never looked as lovely as this time… and then it hit her like a broomstick on her head. Valentine's Day! Bill had been so excited at the door because he had prepared everything to celebrate Valentine's day with her sister! And now she had -

"Aunty Gabrielle! I've missed you so much!"

Gabrielle didn't even have time to think; she just opened her arms and caught her little niece, who had jumped right into her arms.

"Victorie, ma chére," she said and kissed the little girl on the forehead. "I've missed you, too. My, she has grown so much since I've last seen her."

The young woman had said the last one to her brother-in-law, who chose that moment to put a cup of tea in front of her and sat down on the other empty chair.

"Indeed she has," he chuckled, though there was a somewhat forlorn look in his face that Gabrielle couldn't quite place. "But even big girls have to go to sleep, my dear. So say goodnight to your aunt and then off to bed with you."

"But Papa…"

"No buts, and be quiet on your way up, your siblings are already sleeping."

Since the look on her father's face left no room for argumentation, Victoire dropped her head reluctantly, and did as she was told.

"Good night, sweetie, sleep well."

Together, they watched the little girl leave, and after a moment of silence, Elle finally asked the question that's been bugging her for quite some time now.

"Fleur hasn't told you that I was coming?"

Bill laughed dryly. "Well, for that she would have to talk to me, right?"

Gabrielle sighed.

"Why did she send you here anyway? Not that I don't love- erm, like your company."

The blonde tried not to blush. She had heard his slip, even though he covered it skillfully. _As handsome as he might be, he's still your sister's husband, Gabrielle, so don't imagine things that aren't there…_

Trying to clear her thoughts, she took a sip of her tea.

"She wrote me a letter, saying that she was on an important conference and she didn't know how long it would take… she asked me to help you out with the kids, but you seem to have it all perfectly under control."

Bill sighed and stirred his tea with a spoon.

"I'm used to it, Elle. She's gone so many times… I don't even think she noticed how much the kids miss her."

The way his blue eyes looked, broke Gabrielle's heart.

Instinctively, she reached out and squeezed his hand.

To her utter surprise, Bill then took her small hand in his own; and kept on holding it.

The blonde witch felt her heart beating faster with each passing minute and she hated herself for that. Fleur was her sister! She had to remain loyal to her no matter how strong her silly crush on the handsome Weasley in front of her had become.

"Perhaps it will pass, and Fleur will realize how much she has too lose," Elle tried to lighten the mood.

But Bill only dropped his gaze and stared at their entwined hands. "What's worse? New wounds which are so horribly painful or old wounds that should have healed years ago and never did?"

This sounded far worse than she had thought. "Is it really that bad?"

"I've always asked myself what a girl like Fleur could ever see in me… I mean, look at me," he whispered and used his other hand to gesture towards his face. Gabrielle knew what he meant, the scars that Greyback had given him, back then, in the battle of the Astronomy Tower…

"Bill, they're almost gone and you're still an incredibly handsome man," this time, Elle couldn't prevent the blush that was flushing over her cheeks. "And besides, these scars, they are a part of you. They are a sign that you fought bravely for the ones you love."

He looked at and luckily there was once again a tiny smile on his face. "Love. I always thought you weren't very fond of the word yourself, Elle."

She had to admit that he had a point.

"Love… The reason I dislike that word is that it means too much for me, far more than you can understand…" she mumbled and dropped her gaze.

For a moment, Bill just looked at her, then he got up and pulled her to her feet, too. Without an explanation, he led her to the living room window.

The light of the ful-moon was enlightening the ocean, and Elle was fascinated by the sight. It was so quiet by now, that she could even hear the sound of the waves breaking at the shore. Through the open window, she could even smell the salty wind that was brushing through her blonde hair. She inhaled deeply and it somehow managed to calm her down.

At least as long as Bill positioned himself behind her back and carefully put both his strong arms around her, which caused her heart to beat faster and faster.

"I know how you're feeling. You've got your heart broken too many times that you're afraid to ever let someone close to it again," he mumbled into her ear and she could feel the warmth of his breath on her skin. "The heart dies a slow death, shedding each hope like leaves until one day there are none. No hopes. Nothing remains. I know the feeling."

She turned around ever-so-slightly, without stepping out of his embrace, but so she could look him in the eyes.

"What's the best way to heal then?" she whispered in a slightly trembling voice.

He carefully cupped her face with one hand and leaned down. "The only way is to heal each other."

With that, he bent fully down and softly touched her lips with his own.

Gabrielle didn't know what was happening. This blissful feeling that was streaming through her body caused her brain to be completely unable to function. Every rational thought got replaced by a funny looking clouds and her whole body felt like it was on fire.

She knew that she shouldn't, but she pressed herself closer against his strong body and deepened the kiss, heating it up.

In return, he brought his hands fully around her slim body, pulling her even closer. Soon, Elle felt how he was asking for entrance, and once she granted it, their tongues started a small battle.

"Gabrielle…" Bill breathed as the need for air got too great and they broke the kiss.

"Bill… we shouldn't… Fleur… this ins't…" Gabrielle whispered in a slightly trembling voice. They were both breathing heavily, and she knew that the desire that was written in her own eyes was mirrored in his.

"I need you, Elle, I need you to heal my heart," the red-haired man whispered honestly and brushed a strand of blonde hair out of her face.

The way he looked at her made her go weak at the knees. His eyes shone with hope, which the young woman hadn't seen in a long time.

"It… it sounds plausible enough tonight… but wait until tomorrow… wait for the common sense of morning…" she tried to found arguments against what they were doing. _Something that would stop her from falling any further for her sister's husband. Something that would prevent them from making a big, huge mistake which they would both probably regret in the morning._

"Heal my heart," was all Bill replied in a hoarse voice and lowered his face towards hers again.

As much as Gabrielle tried, the tension in the room was too great and simultaneously, they leaned in and kissed each other once again.

Soon, everything around them was forgotten, and Bill picked her up and laid her down on the couch.

Carefully, he kissed his way down his throat until he reached her collar bone.

By now, Gabrielle was completely under his spell, and she reached out to pull his white shirt over his head to reveal the very muscular body she had always wanted to see.

With skilled hands, he opened her blouse and planted more and more kisses on her body.

For a moment, he stopped and simply stared at her.

"What – what is it?" Elle asked, scared that he would regret their actions by now.

But Bill just looked into her green eyes, with his own, and she could see that they were filled with love.

"You're beautiful," he whispered before he bent down and kissed her again senselessly.

* * *

 **So, I actually didn't think that I'd have so much fun writing this...**

 **Tell me what you think, I'd like to know if this has potential for a little multi-chapter story! :)**

 **Yours,**

 **Lexi**


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